26 December 2008

A heart at rest... kinda

Three days ago, I had an outpatient procedure done at Research Medical Center. My mom and I traveled up to Kansas City the night before so that I would be able to make it to the hospital by 6am the next morning. The procedure I had done was called an ablation. It's a procedure done on people who have SVT (look it up), a heart condition that causes rapid heart beat. I had been anticipating this procedure for a month. I knew it would make me feel better, since my heart wouldn't beat too fast anymore. But I was scared. Though I didn't have time to focus on the procedure in previous weeks due to finals and such, the night before I was a wreck. I barely slept. It's kind of funny how your mind can really freak you out, cause mine did. I had tons of people praying for me. I knew God would take care of me and that it would be okay. But somehow, I was still nervous.

Long story short, the procedure was a success. At least, for now. I'll know over the next few months whether it holds or not (there's a 90-95% chance it will), and I believe that it will. I already feel better though, which gives me great hope. I even cried after the procedure because I was so happy (or so doped up on drugs, haha). It's like a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders. God is good!

Now, onto the next big thing: Spain. Whoa. I can't believe it's finally here. I've been waiting for this for a long time. From the time I knew I was coming to Jewell I've been waiting. I didn't think it'd ever come, of course. But it's here. I'm slowly getting things lined up. Buying shoes, clothes, gadgets, and a super safe purse my mom insisted on. But I'm not ready yet. Not emotionally, mentally, or physically. Good thing I still have three weeks. I know it's going to be an amazing experience, but right now, it's just scary.

I got word today that I'm going to be able to see some of my closest friends soon in KC. I can't stinkin wait! I miss them already. Molly thinks it's pathetic, I think it's only natural. I mean come on, we're going to be away for at least 4 months, if not more. I'm already having withdrawls. But for now, I can be excited for the time I can spend with them, take silly pictures, and laugh 'till I cry. How fabulous!

It's times like these that I have to remember to stop and smell the roses. So that's what I'm going to do: cherish the time I have, and look forward with faith and trust in God in what is to come. That's the only way I know how to do it.

20 December 2008

Christmas too soon

Christmas. I have been waiting for this for a month now. It means the stress of the semester is over, and I'm free of homework for a month. It means time with family that I don't see very often. But at the same time, I wish I could go back in time. Why? Because Christmas break means that I leave for Spain in one month. Whoa.

This is something I've been waiting on for 4 years. It's finally here. I'm excited to meet new people, see the sights, and become fluent in Spanish. Yet, I am completely terrified. New place, I don't know a single person, and a language that's not my own. It makes me want to run back to Jewell and forget the whole studying in another country thing. But I know that's not what is going to happen.

So, while I prepare for my adventure, I will cling to the encouragement someone recently gave me who, when I told him I was excited but scared said to me, "Sarah, if anyone can do this, you can." It's the faith that others have in me, my determination to make it through, and God by my side that will move me forward as I push my fears aside and have the time of my life.