21 October 2013

Slowing Down

Life is like a curvy, hilly, back country road. One minute it's up, one minute it's down and, just when you seem to have settled into a rhythm, all the sudden a curve comes out of nowhere. In the last year and a half or so, I've learned more than I've wanted to about how to cope with this road. Nonetheless, I'm still learning how to accelerate into the curves, as my Dad once taught me. One thing I do know: without the support of my family and close friends, I would have pulled the E-Brake long ago. 

With the change of the seasons comes a change in mood, a change in the way I look at life, just a little bit. It's as if an era has ended and a new one has begun. It leaves a weird feeling in the pit of my stomach, one I know only time will ease. So many things remind me of my dad on a daily basis, but one thing stands out to me the most right now: the changing of the leaves. He loved this time of year and always insisted on coming to Missouri from Texas to get a small taste of the beautiful scenery, crisp air and a little time with his kiddos. 

It's in these daily reflections that I find myself thankful for what I have and wanting to soak up every moment. It may sound cliché, but it's truer now than it has ever been. It's also made me slow down. I find myself lingering a bit longer in moments special to me, like nightly walks with my husband and pup, making my nephew giggle or chatting with a dear friend over a cup of coffee. 

The pain is still raw but I take comfort in the small things that bring sweet memories flooding back. It's the memories that remind me that Dad would want us to live life looking forward, loving those precious to us, enjoying the great outdoors and remembering that this life is a gift.